Last year, I came across an article in the Toronto Star about a couple in Toronto who do not want to reveal the gender of their baby. If you would like to read the full article, here is the link: http://www.thestar.com/article/995112.
At such a young age children are told to act a certain way, to dress a certain way, to play with certain toys because of their gender. It makes me question what it truly means to be a woman or a man.
In this article we are exposed to how the parents treat their children, how the two boys behave and how they choose to carry themselves. The parents believe that kids are capable of making meaningful decisions for themselves at a very young age. I was wondering if you agree with this statement why or why not. Furthermore, we learn that Jazz and Kio have a lot more freedom compared to other kids the same age. Their oldest son Jazz prefers to keep his hair long, he likes to wear it in three braids, his favourite colour is pink, he enjoys painting his nails, and he also wears a pink stud in one ear. The fascinating aspect of this is that his parents have short hair, they don’t own anything pink, and they don’t wear jewelry or nail polish.
Here are some questions to consider:
What do you think about their decision to allow Storm to discover on his/her own what gender he/she wants to be.
Can you picture yourselves having this opportunity to challenge the gender norms and to figure out your own identity?
How do you feel about Baby Storm? Do you think his/her parents are doing Storm a favour or just leading him/her to a life filled with struggles?
Would you ever consider not revealing the gender of your baby?
If Storm grows up and chooses a gender that doesn't match his sex, what kind of tolls do you think he/she will experience? and will it be worth it?
Freedom is one of the most important thing in life, without it who knows were we all be. Giving the chances to decided what gender you want to be when you grow up is good thing for storm. He/she might or might not be trapped in body where there body does one thing and his/her mind does another. As all parents wants their son/daughter to grow up and be the best they can be. It can also lead to many difficult road if he chooses the opposite gender. Just like Jenna Talackova he/she might have to perform surgery just to get over the fact that he/she is in the wrong body.
ReplyDeletePs. From the picture does it like like a baby boy or baby girl. ( i think its a boy)
I agree freedom is one of the most important things in life. I feel that the oppertunity that has been given to Storm is a wonderful oppertunity but like many choices there are always consequences. Yes, being a parent is quite hard because at the end of the day we want to guide our children to the best future they can obtain, but that is not easy. Yes, Storm may have to face a decision like Jenna Talackova, but I think that she is truly happy now. Her inside(mind) matches her outside.
DeleteI don't want to say whether Baby Storm's parent's decision is right or wrong because they are the baby's parents and already parents of two before so they know what is best for the baby. However I think that if Storm's choice is that of the opposit sex Storm will face some sort of discrimination. Looking at the picture I don't want to say whether the baby is a boy or a girl but Storm is very cute. I however personally would reveal the gender of my baby. I am very religious and so for me I believe god decided whether you are a girl or boy and you can't go against his wishes. He knows what's best. You can't decide what gender you want to be. It is not in your hands.
ReplyDeleteI don't think parents know best. Even the best of best parents have faults.
DeleteI have to agree with Maheen, I don't think parents know best even if they have experience, because you are not going to have the same experience with each child. I agree that Storm might face some sort of discrimination because he/she is different. We approach things/individuals who do not fit the "norm" as strange because they are not the same as the others. I respect your religious views, but God also created hermaphordiets, individuals who have both sexual parts. What gender are they?
DeleteI agree that parents also make mistakes and that they are only human. They have their own experiences which may not apply to the child because every individual is different but at a young age when you can't make your own decisions, you look up to your parents to make them for you.
DeleteI think at a young we do make decisions, maybe they aren't the best, but we learn from our mistakes. How many kids actually listen to their parents when they tell them that the stove is hot? Not many, a lot of kids find that out by actually touching the stove. We make decisions ever since we are young, from what toy to play with, who we want to be with, or whether we want to eat or not.
DeleteThe decision that Storm's parents made is good to challenge the gender norms that the other parents put to their child after giving birth. It is a good idea, but there's also consequences for that. For example, when the baby started to figure out what he/she likes and also his/her gender, it will be a problem when he/she hit puberty. What if the baby thinks that he was a boy himself and it turns out that his body belongs to a girl. At the end, Storm will only be confused about his gender and there's a high possibility that his/her parents will be blame for that.
ReplyDeleteYes I see your point, but there will always be consequences for any decisions you make. If Storm thinks he/she is a boy in a girls body I understand the troubles he/she might have to go through, but one's sex(between your legs) has nothing to with one's gender(between your ears). I don't Storm will be confused about his/her gender because many of us don't know the difference between gender and sex, but I think his/her parents will inform Storm about what gender truly means. At the end, I think he/she will be a well-rounded individual because he/she will truly understand who he/she is, not what he/she was told to be.
DeleteThe choice for Storm is to pick her preferred gender is an excellent experience of nature vs nurture influence. I may do the same with my child too.
ReplyDeleteIs it a normal thing to influence a child's favourite things due to their gender? Why does a boy have to play with cars, trucks, and action figures and a girl can only play with Barbie Dolls and My Little Pony?
If Storm picks her opposite sex, she may just be judged a homosexual during her child hood life. If she/he is a girl and picks a boy life, then she may be judged as a lesbian because she may act like a Tom boy, and the other way around if he/she was a boy and acted like a girl and proclaimed as gay male.
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteI agree it is an excellent experience of nature vs. nurture, and it'll be interesting to figure out which one is more dominant.
DeleteI guess it can be considered "normal" because a lot of individuals tend to do this. However, I don't think they do it intentionally. For example, when an adult is holding a baby girl they use high pitch voices and I don't think they do that on purpose, it might just come naturally. I think a lot of that has to do with dominant discourse because of what society thinks a girl should play with or what a boy should play with. We are given rules or boundaries that society does not want us to cross even before we are born but Storm is lucky.
In media, boys who act like girls are protrayed as homosexuals, and girls who act like boys are protrayed as lesbians. This is a negative stereotype that does harm and prevents males from being a bit feminine, and females from being a bit masculine because then they would be called a woman or a man.
When I first read this, it sounded real appealing. However, when I started to think about the decision of Storm's parents, I don't think it really makes a difference. Storm is seemed to be in a lab experiment, where the point is to avoid gender stereotypes. Storm will encounter many stereotypes throughout his/her life, and this will challenge society. Do we call Storm pretty or handsome? One may dominate over the other, which will then be used as identity. In real life, individuals are challenged within their gender type, and sometimes when one does not match, there are sex changes and I believe the same will happen to Storm. From this experiment, questions that pop up in my head are whether it's possible to be both genders at the same time? What if Storm doesn't pick ONE gender and both genders dominate at both times? What gender will Storm really defines itself as? What really defines a man, or a woman? If Storm is not given a specific gender for nature vs. nurture to challenge, won’t this cause more problems in challenging the gender stereotypes? Gender (how you are born), is not a choice, but how you want to exist and represent yourself in the world is. I would not do this with my child, but for example if my daughter wants to play with action figures, I won’t stand in her way.
ReplyDeleteI agree Storm will encounter many stereotypes throught his/her life because people exist, and we(not everyone) use stereotypes not knowingly. Why can't we call him/her adorable? or wonderful? In the article it discusses about gender hybrids individuals who believe they are part boy, and part girl. Nature vs. nurture is a debate about whether our society has an impact or our biological traits have a impact, on an indivdual as a whole, not gender. For example, Storm's brother Jazz, likes the colour pink but his parents don't own anything that is pink.
DeleteI find this ridiculous. You don’t choose your gender, it’s something you are born with. You can be a boy and like pink, wear jewelry and so on. You don’t have to change your gender to like non-traditional things. You are your gender. And as for being trapped in your body, what is being trapped within your body? Your mind. Your mind doesn’t think freely at a conscious level. Stereotypes can be challenged not erased. Parents can raise their children opposite with the dominant discourse, for example give a boy Barbies and action figures to play with, multicolour their wardrobe and so on. There is a reason why sex and gender are synonymous, gender is determined from your sex organs at birth.
ReplyDeleteSure it would be interesting to see what little Storm decides for him/herself, but I don't think that it's right to put such responsibilities on a child. I think that parents are suppose to guide their children through the younger ages, showing them right from wrong and helping them avoid unnecessary trouble. Having your child confused when you could have easily helped them out is unnecessary trouble.
ReplyDeleteI don't think I would be able to do this myself or as a child. I have 4 older brothers so trying to face the trials a girl goes through while surrounded by male oriented toys and games wouldn't be fun. I would probably end up a tomboy, if I was a girl.
If Storm does grow up and chooses the gender that is opposite of his/her sex, I don't think it would be worth it. He/she would go through unnecessary hardships which could have been easily avoided. It might be easier for him/her if the majority of the world stop discriminating against lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgenders. If not, not worth it at all.
I believe that the situation Storm got put on is different than your's Abdinasir. You have been raised with other males in the family. In Storm's family, both of her siblings get to choose what to play with and how to dress. Her siblings wont influence her as much as yours.
DeleteI dont agree with this whatsoever. A baby is born with a specific gender. Your gender is not the same thing as your gender identity. If you would like to give your child girl and boy toys, as well as dress them plainly and not gender specific, then go ahead; but hiding its own gender is strange. He or she will eventually realize whether they are a boy or girl just by looking down.
ReplyDeleteThe concept is a good idea, but to confuse the child like that will not get them anywhere.
For example, if you have a son, and he grows up feeling like he should have been born a woman, as in the Miss Universe Pageant, then at least there is information about his situation and steps he can take to changing his gender. Same goes for a woman who feels she should have been born a man. But to have a child of either sex, and not tell them whether they are a girl or boy will achieve nothing.
Frankly, I feel bad for Storm, because he or she is going to grow up one very confused little boy or girl.
I agree with you that the parents are just confusing Storm, but one shouldn't change their gender.
DeleteThe arguements for pro-gender alteration are the individual has the mentality of the opposite gender and if he/she thinks of themselves as that gender than they are regardless of the reproductive organs. But their argument is contradicting. If their reproductive organs don’t matter than why do they feel the need to change it? Your gender is defined by your sex organs. Whether someone’s mentality is masculine or feminine is irrelevant because their differentiation is based on stereotypes. Societal norms tell us what’s masculine or feminine and societal norms can and should be challenged. Does a female need to get a penis to like sports, cars, video games and so on? Does a male need to get a vagina to like pink, sensitive, or be nurturing to their children. No, they don’t.
Maheen, to your statement of the contradiction, I'd like to suggest something. I am not someone who has been in a situation of that sort, neither have I witnessed someone who's been in that situation, but this is what I feel is their mentality. They most likely feel that they need to change their physical appearance of 'parts' because they feel the need to be as female (if it's a man who believes she's a female) as possible.
DeleteI think part of it is also, that they want the world too see who they really are as well. Changing their physical appearance might give them the extra confidence that they require to carry out their life. Can you imagine living a life where you are male to everybody else, but to your own self you're a female (or vise versa). These people have probably had a hard time carrying out their daily life, with the mirrored life that they live.
Firstly, if you change who you are than you don't really have confidence, so changing your gender gives them a fake confidence. A person will fight for their right to like thing contrary to the social norms for genders, if they had any confidence. I have a question for all pro-gender alteration: You think I am wrong when I say “Societal norms tell us what’s masculine or feminine” then what does? What is the differentiating factor between masculinity and femininity?
DeleteWhen I read the article I have to say I was very intrigued because the situation Storm and his/her parents are in raises some interesting questions. For example, are human beings influenced by their heredity or the environment (which is the old debate of nature versus nurture)? I don't know what the correct answer is but I tend to lean towards nurture that human beings are more influenced by their personal experiences because experiences are what makes us who we are. Also, I think because the parents are giving Storm the chance to decide for him/herself what gender he/she wants to be they're teaching him/her to be independent and be able to use his/her free will to choose what he/she wants. Freedom of choice is so important because it is what makes humans different from other species: the ability to choose for yourself. That is why I think the parents' choice to let their child choose from an early age is such an incredible choice because they have given their kids a chance to truly explore what it means to have freedom of choice. Is their decision wise? Yes, I think it is because does it really matter if the child decides that he/she wants to have long hair? For instance, let us assume that the parents had decided to raise their oldest son Jazz as a boy and make him conform to the dominant discourse. Eventually, the kid will grow up to figure out what he wants because it's only a matter of time. Hence, does it really make a huge difference whether the child learns from an early age who he is and what he wants versus having him figure that out when he is in his teens? No, not really, because one way or another he would figure it out. Lastly, I would like to disagree with Maheen because gender and sex are NOT the same thing (something I recently learned too). Gender is the social and cultural construction or interpretation of differences between the sexes (masculinity/femininity), and sex is biological distinction or differences.
ReplyDeleteIf you truly believe that than why do they feel the need to change their heir reproductive organs don’t matter than why do they feel if their gender isn't defined by it? You admitted social and cultural construction decide masculinity/femininity, shouldn't they be challenged? Are you tell me I need to get a penis to like stereotypically male things? Gender is defined by your reproductive organ. Social and cultural norms should be challenged.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete