Mind the offensive language of the children and I please :).
So being a male myself, I understand the slandering that most women have to put up with. I have male friends who will insult women at any opportunity they get. Why? Just because they were turned down or rejected in some way. If the girl doesn't like him back, she's a hoe, plain and simple. The media doesn't help the situation much by using this for "good television". Good luck finding a girl with that attitude.
Don't get me wrong, not all men are at fault here. This is just a select few of course. It's always the select few that are to blame for the stereotype directed towards a group. A select few women find it right to blame every single man for the doings of one. What? How does this make sense at all? So if one friend back stabs me, all my other friends are guilty of being backstabbers as well? I assume this only leads to loneliness and not the desired reassurance I would believe the select few of women would have been searching for.
Anyway, what's your take on this? Am I just mindlessly rambling or is there some sense to these generalizations and stereotypes that I'm just not picking up on?
Women,in my perspective, seem to hold grudges longer and try speculate it into a group instead of an individual to help spread their anger so it doesn't go out of control. Or it's just PMS.
ReplyDeleteYes, women do tend to hold grudges but for a minimal amount of time because just as media portrays, women are forgiving. However, women in this case blame the male population as a form of defense mechanism, a way of protection. She's been cheated on once, and not wanting to get hurt once again, she builds a wall until the right one comes along to break it down. This is where male stereotypes play in because it's interesting to see what women want, and what women really need in a partner (knight in shining armor…). Women tend to go for the “bad boy” type, knowing he is not the right one, but she accepts the challenge, and is wanting to change him. When something goes wrong in a relationship, women tend to blame the partner, rather than admitting to their own mistakes. Why? Because it's easier to do that, then saying ..."I've ended up hurting myself, all men are not like this". This is done by both genders in similar cases. It's natural to feel insecure, and to put yourselves out there after being cheated out, which is by women disclose themselves from the male population. Though women do tend to do forgive and forget as we age, and the level of maturity rises.
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DeleteI would agree on your point when you said, "she builds a wall until the right ones comes along to break it down." In the movie "Think Like A Man", Mya wants to do the same. To protect herself, she enforces the 90 day rule, but her plan fails. To every wall, it must break down eventually. Breaking a brick wall just takes lots of aggressive force with a hammer, and the 90 day rule just took to say a simple "I Love You."
DeleteWomen do tend to hold a grudge for a long period of time but not all of them. Likewise there are men out there who hold grudges aswell. Every individual is different and has their own way of handling a breakup. I agree that it is not right to blame the whole male population if only one broke your heart but everyone does that some time in their life. Some thing wrong happens and people quickly judge that all people from that "group" are like that. I think it is natural to judge but it is better not to because everyone has their own personality. No two people are alike.
ReplyDeleteI find it ridiculous how a male always has to pay. Societal expectations govern us, which is fine if not taken too seriously. I believe in equality. Males and females both need to pay, if one pays for this dinner than the other should pay for the next one. A relationship can also be called a partnership because both individuals are equally responsible for it. This expectation of the male paying also alludes to another societal expectation that males need to make more than females. My question is who would you expect to pay if it's a homosexual relationship? My answer would be the same, both. If the couple can't share the responsibility, then whoever earns more can pay, but the other one should treat whenever they can.
ReplyDeleteMaheen, I partly agree but I also partly disagree with your point.Yes, I believe in equality as well ... but what if it's a first date? The female pays first for instance, that means the male will pay for the second date. But what if there is no second date? This is why I like to believe that when going out on a date, especially when it's a male and a female, "both" should pay for their own self. I want to generalize the male and female relationship specifically because the fact that it's like a tradition for the man to pay for the woman is ridiculous. Women are educated, they have jobs which earns them income, therefore they can also pay for themselves because money does not grow on trees, you have to work for it. I believe that if women start utilizing this new "tradition", the stereotypes linked to us(fragile, work in kitchen,work at low-status occupations ...) may not look as much relevant anymore.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you. I didn't consider the first date scenario. I think it's upon females to try changing this stereotype!
DeleteLet's have another guy's perspective on this. When woman feel betrayed they of course blame the male population until "prince charming" comes along to catch them from their fall. Some of the things that adds on to their blame towards men are movies. Romantic ones especially. They show how men should be towards woman and that builds up inside most women liking towards a man. Sadly, it's hard to face reality when you want something that hardly exists. When a woman is cheated on or dumped this causes the most of the female population to hate on men, since most of them believe that most if not all men are the same.
ReplyDeleteThe irony in this clip which talks about how Riley thinks all woman are "hoes". The reason why I find this ironic is because the voice of Riley Freeman is a woman named Regina King. She is also the voice of Riley's brother Huey Freeman if anyone is wondering.
Basically, in my opinion not all women believe that all men are to blame, but the one that caused it.
I agree to Keshmi when she said, "women in this case blame the male population as a form of defense mechanism". In my perspective, it is only natural for a women to think that men are all cheaters especially if their first love broke their heart. It is a terrible experience if someone you loved cheated on you. Also, it isn't necessary for men to treat the women on their first date. It is only the media that says how men should act on their first dates. Being a female, I prefer to pay my own food and movie on my first date. I am not really that close to the guy I'm dating so why would I ask him to treat me?
ReplyDeleteI agree with Maheen, relationships are, or should be treated as partnerships (in profit or loss). Both need to carry the same amount of responsibility and both need to go into the relationship expecting to make it work. And if it doesn't work, then neither should jump to conclusions and blame the other, or the whole population (of the partner's sex) for the relationship not having worked out.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I am wrong when I suggest this, but can't the person who asks to go out on a dinner date pay, since the person themselves suggested it? (This way, if let's say A always suggests it and pays, but B never suggests it, then A can determine if he/she wants to continue with dinner dates, or move onto something that doesn't require money). If it turns out to be just one date, then there’s really nothing that can be done, except the person who doesn’t pay, could treat the partner for something nice right after dinner, like let’s say ice-cream, cake, or something that would be a nice, welcome gesture; both partners should show care (and care does not always equal money). Basically what I'm saying is that a relationship will only work if both sides make some sort of compromise (because it's impossible, on a normal basis for both sides to get exactly what they want).
I have to agree with Abdinasir, just become one person does something wrong you can't blame it entire population because of that one person. Similar to this stereotype, there is another stereotype about a blond hair women being dumb. If soceity says that a blond hair women is dumb, then the world would also think blond hair women are dumb,BUT you are only judging that person based on one thing she has done. Due to the fact, that blonds hair women around the world are being judged at because of one person stupid mistake.
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